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Definitely not

Guild Wars 2: too soon? A 12.7MB, 22 minute MP3 file. Take a sip of your favourite beverage every time Michael Zenke says “definitely.”

Posted in Web.


Global wanging

Climate Debate Daily. We’re doomed! No, we’re not!

Posted in Web.


Readers’ digest

The classics condensed. In three lines or less.

Posted in Web.


Creature feature

This is Modulok.
Mattel He-Man and the Masters of the Universe Modulok
Modulok could kick Will Wright’s ass with one arm and two legs tied behind his back.

That said, I’m still eagerly looking forward to Will Wright’s latest (and I suspect his greatest) game, Spore, after seeing user-created creatures made with the Spore Creature Creator. The creative juices have clearly been flowing because wondrous beasts hitherto unseen have been conceived. There are walking wangs, flying phalluses, dongs with indiscernible means of locomotion … this tremendous diversity is truly a testament to the limitless human capacity for imagination.

The standalone editor is supposed to go on sale today but apparently everyone on the Internet has managed to procure it through fair means (demo disks containing the trial version) or foul. I’m not sure how the editor will be made available legally to folks outside the US but I hope to get it as soon as possible. As software toys go, this looks brilliant.

Update 18/6: the trial version is up now.

Posted in Games, Pix, Spore, Toys.


Jump

Final Fantasy XII
(Image source: SCEA.)

We’ve certainly come a long way since the days of Pong when the only choices to be made were going up or, if it struck our fancy, going down. However, gamers are still restricted to far too few real choices these days. (Real choices are genuine alternatives and not simply choosing between killing something with a warhammer or a ninja sword.) It still feels like we’re only picking up breadcrumbs on pre-determined paths in order to find the next hoop we’re meant to jump through.

The exasperating thing about this is there’s generally only a few paths to be taken even in big-budget titles. Some games may boast of freedom of exploration and non-linear gameplay but often as not there’s only one method of solving a problem in those games: the method the designers’ thought of. As the joke goes, if said method doesn’t involve killing or sneaking, it’s an extraordinary game and should be given a Special Achievement Award.

Martin Cirulis railed against this in one of his classic Computer Gaming World columns. He wondered why he needed to find a key for the door in an FPS when he was toting a BFG. Shouldn’t he be able to blast the door to smithereens or blow a hole in the wall?

That was a decade ago yet the problem persists.

The Gamers With Jobs crew, in their most recent podcast, discussed The Bourne Identity, a game that straightjacketed players so tightly that it would actually remove weapons out of the player character’s hands when the designers insisted on a hand-to-hand fight.
Continued…

Posted in Games, PS2.