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Death be not proud

There are few dignified deaths in games with ragdoll physics. I’ve witnessed a lot of death in Stalker: Shadow of Chernobyl but this takes the cake.
Stalker: Shadow of Chernobyl: Death
If limbo contests had fatalities, this is what I imagine it would be like.

Posted in Games.


Do-o-o-o-om

From Fantastic Four # 17 (1963):
Fantastic Four # 17: Doom Demands
Dr. Doom, Secretary of Housing and Urban Development.

Posted in Comics.


Thrill of victory, agony of defeat

Here’s where I stand after playing Team Fortress 2 for three weeks.
Team Fortress 2: stats
There’s not much an improvement though I’ve been playing a lot. Probably too much. I’m no psychologist but I’m guessing it’s a bad sign when you can hear the Demoman’s anguished “Meeeeeh-deeeck!” cry when you’re sleeping.

I’ve played a little of all the classes but I still feel the most comfortable with the Medic. I’m not as familiar with the maps as I’d like to be and playing as the Medic gives me the opportunity to follow and observe while still making a contribution to the team effort. I generally latch on to the most accomplished player on the team and observe tactics employed on the battlefield.

The best differ from the mediocre in so many different ways. Even the way they move is different. The best tend to jump about like overcaffeinated kangaroos, making it very difficult to draw a bead on them, while new players tend to move in very predictable patterns, making them prime candidates for a headshot.

Ultimately, what separates the best from the rest is marksmanship and the ability to keep cool under pressure. That’s “and,” not “or.” Great marksmanship is useless if you get flustered under fire. As I do. I haven’t played that many FPS games in the past few years and my reflexes and WASD skills, never sterling to begin with, are pretty rusty. I still can’t get over the panic I feel whenever I come face to face with an opponent who doesn’t have the decency to stand still while I kill him.
Continued…

Posted in Games.


RED versus BLU

Here’s where I stand after one week of playing Team Fortress 2.
Team Fortress 2: Stats after one week
There is enough of an improvement to make me cling to the hope of one day of appearing competent.

The key word there: appearing.

As one might surmise from the name, Team Fortress 2 is the sequel to Cooking Mama. No, it’s not. It’s actually the sequel to 1999’s Team Fortress Classic, in turn a remake of a Quake mod released in 1996. No cooking is involved whatsover. Wait, there is the Pyro. Okay, some cooking.
Continued…

Posted in Games.


My Allegedly Best TF2 Moments

Team Fortress 2: stats, more stats and masochistic
Stats that aren’t recorded

Decibel level of loudest scream of rage and frustration after being killed by the same goddamned spy six times in a row.

Highest number of expletives yelled out in a round.

Number of times “lag” or “internet connection” is blamed for deaths in a round.

Number of times killed just as ubercharge is ready.

Number of times you’re switched to a losing team for balance.

Highest number of 4-chan memes observed during a round.

Highest number of times killed without accomplishing anything whatsoever.

Posted in Games.